Your wired up wrong  

My name is ………..And I’m an alcoholic 

When I was 19, I was cycling to work, I don’t know why, as I had a car. But cycling I was.  

Maybe I’d parked my car and couldn’t find it. Not unusual for an alcoholic to do. 

I lost my van once for a few days once. Three days, I think. Who knows what had happened the night before. But lose my van I did. I was in blackout nightly, since I’d started drinking. Probably since I was maybe 12 or 13 years old. 

 Blackout drinking was to me just a part of my life. It in some way had become a badge of honour. At least if I had a blackout, I knew the night before had been a good night. If I could remember what I’d done, it was considered a wasted night. A waste of money. And not to be repeated. And I very rarely did. 

What a crazy thing to think. I was only just starting on my road towards oblivion. And I was still only a little boy of 15 years old.  

Anyway, I was cycling to work, and a friend stopped me on my pushbike. He told I needed to go to AA. I sat on my bike in disbelief.  Completely blank faced. I felt like I’d been poleaxed. 

I was insulted and hurt. But I was also amazed that no one had told me before. He left me there, in the road, bemused and confused. I never did go.  

I was then working in the building trade. I was doing odd jobs. Some decorating, tiling, fixing doors, and some light plumbing. I was gathering the tools of my trade together.  

I was learning the ropes as a builder. I obviously enjoyed it. And I started buying old houses to renovate and to let out. That is now my profession. And I’m now an Investor. A property investor. It sounds posh. But it isn’t.  

Not an easy profession to be in. The TV shows that portray property development, renovating, investing, and letting, don’t tell half the story. They don’t show the real pitfalls and bankruptcies that occur. The heartaches and real-life problems that befall the unwary and uninitiated in the property market.  It is a cutthroat, evil business if you don’t get it right.  

Most people don’t get it right. Some do. But only a few. We did. In the property game, you learn by your mistakes, you learn from the trades you employ. And the mistakes can be life changing, and the banks are ruthless when things are not going well. It’s fun game to be in, if it stays fun.  

It’s not fun when it is not fun. It can be suicidal. It often is. When a property development goes horribly wrong, it can tip a company over the edge. And it has tipped many people over the edge.  

If you check up the life insurance rates of property investors, you’ll see they are up there with the high-risk professions. Many dangerous high-risk professions. Go into this line of work if you want. But nothing is without its problems.  

Recessions happen irregularly, and without warning. They can be catastrophic and life changing for those who are under capitalised.  

We have always been on the right side of right. I have learnt the ropes of everything to do with property, how, by learning the ropes. Not easy when you throw active alcoholism on top of everything.  

Electrical Wiring is a profession we know well. It’s easy to understand, easy to fix and to install. Different wiring colours depict which wires go were. All is safe and easy if the earth is correct, and the colouring diagrams are followed. Simple mistakes lead to some unusual situations.  

Appliances going bang, the electric power shutting down, or things going backwards.  Maybe Lights going off when they are switched on. Or Lights not turning off or not turning on.  

With the modern RCDs, and surge protectors, any dangerous situations will trip the main fuse. When I was a few months sober, my sponsor told me this one day. That `I was just wired up wrong`.  

I had to agree I was. I just seemed to see things differently than the rest of the world. Things just happened on a separate set of principles. And everything went on opposite.  

My wires that dealt with feelings and relationships were left out. My wires that carried my resentments and fears were double sized. My whole wiring diagram of life was misread.  

 It was like I was wired on reverse with no stop button. My fuses weren’t broke, they just didn’t exist. I recon my sponsor had a point. Maybe he was right. 

The baby factory in the sky was on a Friday afternoon shift, the day I was born.  Going to Alcoholics Anonymous, was my chance to start to a major rewire.  

Strip out the old, renew the dangerous, and keep what is safe. It was an easy ask but not easy to do. But It’s called a 12-step recovery programme. 

Incorrect wiring causes fires and I was nearly burnt out. In the years I’ve been in recovery, it seems as if I’ve been completely rebuilt.  

AA is a great rebuilder of broken people. It has rebuilt the broken me. It gave me some new foundations. AA is my lifetimes maintenance plan. And to this day its worked.  

But one piece of advice to anyone who thinks they are slightly wired up wrong, don’t ask a jobbing builder to sort you out. Ask the professionals.  

Ask Alcoholics Anonymous.  

Anon